There are sermons people clap for, and there are sermons people keep quiet about. Today’s is the second type. This is not about prosperity, not about “your enemies shall die,” not about the prayer points that keep churches full on Friday night. This is about the conversations we do not want to have; the things that happen in the dark corners of our churches and homes, yet are covered with hymns, offerings, and pious smiles.

Let us be honest: sexual abuse is no longer an “outside problem.” It is our problem. It is happening in religious places, it is happening in our homes, and it is happening under the noses of parents who ought to protect their children. Worse still, religion is being used as a cover to hide these sins.

The Holy Mask of Sin

We live in a society where the man who preaches about holiness in the morning may be grooming a teenager in the evening. Where a pastor can be laying hands on women during service, but laying with them after service. Where fathers – yes, fathers; turn bedrooms into prisons for their daughters.

And when victims try to cry out, what do we do? We silence them. We say, “Don’t bring shame to the church. Don’t touch the Lord’s anointed. Don’t scatter this family.” In other words: shut up, swallow your pain, and let the predator keep smiling in his cassock or in his agbada.

That silence is killing us. That silence is destroying our children. That silence is not godliness, it is cowardice.

Case Study 1: The Choir Girl and the Reverend

A few years ago, a case in Lagos made the rounds quietly, though most churches hushed it up. A teenage choir member confessed that her Reverend had been “counseling” her privately. At first, it was prayers and “Bible study.” Then it turned into hugs. Then into touches. Then into full-blown sexual encounters.

When she broke down and told her mother, the woman’s first reaction was not to protect her daughter, but to protect the pastor’s name. “Don’t say this outside. Do you want to destroy the work of God?”

But whose work is being destroyed – God’s, or the predator’s? By the time the girl’s truth came out, she was already pregnant. The Reverend had long been transferred to another parish.

This is not an isolated story. It is the template of how abuse works in religious settings: access, grooming, exploitation, silence.

Parenting: The First Failed Pulpit

We love to quote Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go.” But how many parents are actually training their children for the dangers of this world?

Some parents leave their children completely in the hands of “Men of God,” as though pastors are angels who never feel lust. They allow their teenage daughters to go alone to “counseling sessions.” They allow prophets to lay hands on their children in dark rooms. They invite strangers in the name of house fellowship, and then go to sleep while their children are exposed.

Let me say it plainly: A parent who does not guard his home has already handed his children to wolves.

• A father in Delta State repeatedly raped his stepdaughter. When the girl told her mother, the woman shut her down because “he is the one feeding us.” The girl grew up broken, angry, and distrustful of religion.
• In Abuja, a so-called prophet was discovered to be “cleansing” young girls of demonic spirits through sexual rituals. Parents lined up their children for this, believing it was spiritual therapy. By the time police intervened, lives had been ruined.

Parenting is not just about paying fees and buying food. It is about protecting dignity, teaching boundaries, and giving children the courage to speak up when violated.

The Dangerous Theology of Silence

The church today has perfected a theology of silence. When scandals happen, instead of truth, we choose damage control. Instead of repentance, we choose cover-up. Instead of justice, we choose “Let us not bring reproach to the name of Christ.”

But let us ask ourselves: whose name are we really protecting? Christs or the church brand?

Jesus never protected hypocrites. He called Pharisees “whitewashed tombs.” He chased money-changers out of the temple with a whip. Yet today, when a man of God is caught abusing a child, we move him quietly to another branch, like a company transferring a corrupt staff.

This is why predators thrive in religious spaces: they know the church hates bad press more than it hates sin.

Sex, Silence, and Shame

The problem is not just the abusers; it is also the way we treat victims.

• If a girl is abused by her father, people say, “Why didn’t you run away?”
• If a church member is raped by her pastor, they say, “You must have tempted him.”
• If a boy is molested by a relative, they say, “Don’t say this outside, you will disgrace the family.”

In other words, we shame the victim and shield the abuser. That is why countless victims of sexual abuse in Nigeria never speak until adulthood, if they ever speak at all.

And so, the cycle continues: abuse, silence, cover-up, trauma.

A Church That Punishes Victims

Here is the hypocrisy of our religious spaces: the rapist can still take holy communion, but the victim, if she gets pregnant, is excommunicated. The elder who violated a maid will still be allowed to preach, but the girl, if she speaks out, is branded “wayward.”

What kind of gospel is that? That is not the gospel of Christ. That is the gospel of hypocrisy.

Case Study 2: The Maid and the Master

In Benin City, a wealthy church deacon employed a young maid from the village. The girl was 12. Within weeks, he began raping her. His wife discovered it and confronted him. Do you know what he said? “Don’t let the devil scatter this marriage. She is only a maid.”

The wife, bound by fear of shame, chose to keep silent. The girl’s cries became her lullaby every night. By 15, the maid had run away, damaged for life.

Let us be clear: silence is not holiness. It is complicity.

A Call to Parents

Parents must rise. Protect your children. Stop sacrificing them on the altar of family honor or religious loyalty.

• Teach your children that their body is sacred.
• Teach them that “No” means “No,” even if the person demanding access is a pastor, prophet, uncle, or auntie.
• Create an environment where your children can speak freely about anything, even the uncomfortable things.

The first church is not the cathedral in town. The first church is your living room. If you fail there, no Sunday school can repair it.

A Call to Churches

Churches must stop treating sexual abuse as “embarrassing scandals.” They are crimes, not mere lapses.

• Stop silencing victims in the name of protecting “the anointed.”
• Stop transferring predatory pastors like files from one office to another.
• Stop protecting reputation over righteousness.

A holy place that tolerates abuse is not holy. It is a brothel with stained glass.

Courage to Confront

I know this is not an easy message. It is easier to shout “Breakthrough!” and “Your enemies shall die!” But the truth is, our real enemies are not witches flying at night. Sometimes they are fathers with twisted lusts, pastors with wandering hands, elders with unholy appetites, mothers who look away.

The gospel demands courage. The courage to call sin by its real name. The courage to protect the weak, even if it means confronting the strong. The courage to choose justice over cover-up.

Final Reflections

Sex is sacred. Parenting is sacred. Religion is sacred. But when these three are corrupted, they produce monsters; monsters that look like men of God, smile like fathers, and talk like mentors, but devour souls.

So let us ask ourselves this Sunday:

• Are we raising children who can speak up, or victims who must suffer in silence?
• Are our churches sanctuaries of healing, or cemeteries of innocence?
• Are we parents protecting our homes, or pimps hiding behind prayers?

Until we answer honestly, our religion is nothing more than a mask.

Because God is not mocked. And one day, the stained glass will shatter, and the truth will stand naked before His throne.

This is Sunday sermon from my holy pulpit!

Ewere Okonta is the CEO of EOB Media. He is a family values advocate. He writes from the Department of Business Administration, University of Delta, Agbor.